I love “My Best Friends Wedding” as you may already know I am a massive fan of Julia Roberts aka Jules in my world. Yet it is quite a strange film in terms of the ending really isnt what you would expect from Hollywood but is it more realistic? In my world yes it is. Its heartbreaking at times but thats life isn’t it. I have probably watched this film more times that people can actually imagine. Quite a few months ago I eventually got round to see “Made of Honor” which I had heard was like MBFW but the other way round. I however have to totally disagree with that and this post will end up in a rant that men always win no matter what the situation is.
Made and released more than 10 years apart really shows the direction in which romantic comedies aka rom-coms have come over the years. That direction is down. Don’t get me wrong some have been quite good like “Forgetting Sarah Marshall” and “(500) Days of Summer”. But way exactly have I enjoyed these? They have more realistic moments in them and manage to connect to the audience in different ways. Especially (500) Days of Summer it is so realistic and good how throughout the film it reminds us it is not a love story it is a story about love, and showing how different your expectations are in comparison to what reality is.
My Best Friends Wedding (1997) you can read the review I wrote here.
The main plot for this film is that Julianne and Michael have been friends for a long time. Julianne is a food critic and Michael is a sports writer which means they both travel a lot and therefore go quite a while without seeing each other at times. But when Michael talks to Julianne and informs her that she is getting married and wants her to fly in the next day for the full weekend wedding. This is when Julianne realises that she is in love with Michael and has been for years but was too scared to admit it to herself. Hence then trying to split them up and stop the wedding her friend George (who is gay but they pretend to be engaged) coming out with a great quote “It’s amazing the clarity which comes with psychotic jealously”. But in the end Julianne realises Michael wants Kimmy and not her. She even lends them, Michael and her’s song for there first wedding dance. Quite a sad ending from the viewpoint of Julianne she had lost her friend and was alone.
Made of Honor (2008) you can read the review I wrote here.
The main plot in this film is that Tom who is a major womanizer who never has a relationship and lives his life with one night stands, his best friend is Hannah. They had never been together hence being able to be friends. When Hannah goes away on a business trip to Scotland Tom realises that his life does not work without her in it, and the time difference makes calling her very difficult. He then puts it together that he is in love with her and plans to tell her this on her return to the USA. However it does not go to Tom’s plan when Hannah announces that she is engaged to a Scottish man and going to marry him in Scotland and move there. Tom becomes her maid of honor and tries to figure out how to win her back. This included a lot of competing with Colin trying to show he is the better man. Hannah does not marry Colin and does eventually end up with Tom.
What annoys me?
Well the main thing that really annoys me after these two films have been compared in the past and it has been stated that “Made of Honor” was like “My Best Friends Wedding” but the other way round. However I totally disagree with that, it only would have been the other way round if Tom had ended up alone like he pretty much deserved to be. He was a typical man who decided that he was in love with his best friend once she was happy with someone else. He then decided that he just had to have her and wanted to change his womanizing ways. I suppose Michael in My Best Friends Wedding showed a lot of jealously when he thought Julianne was engaged to George which was also an annoyance when he was days away from marrying Kimmy. Are men really that self centred that they want it all but do not want the women in there life to be happy if it is not with them? Maybe I am being very cynical and totally over thinking all of this but I am basing a lot of this on my personal experiences as well.
Can a man and woman really be just friends?
My personal answer to this question is yes and will always be yes. I have quite a few close male friends who have always been my friends and will always be just that never anything more than that. Hollywood seems to tell us that you cannot really be just friends as when one of the friends is very serious with someone else thats it you have to have them. Even though you didnt want them for the previous 10+ years and so on. I guess its another way Hollywood tries to romance situations by saying that the perfect person for you could be by your side all the time and you don’t even realise it.
Maybe it is some strange momentary jealously thing were you don’t want to be alone in the sense of your friend leaving you. As once they get serious and married with someone you aren’t going to see them as much as you do at the moment. You feel like your losing them or something. But would making them leave someone else for you really be a good start to actually being together as a couple. I very much doubt it.
Real life?
I just found “My Best Friends Wedding” to be more like something that would happen in real life. Especially when George explains to Julianne that she will let him go and tell him to be happy because thats just how everything goes. I really do believe that is what would have happened. Obviously she does try to be with him and the wedding is cancelled for a few hours until she confesses that it was all her fault. It may sound pretty bad but I really could imagine doing something silly like that.
So what do you make of men wanting to have it all?
Women not knowing what they want?
Do you prefer one of these films to the other?
Let's Go To The Movies 
I’m not fond of either movie to be honest, but the subject is an interesting one to discuss. I think in general there is an objectification of women AND men in these kinds of roles. There is a pigeon holing of what is typical or isn’t from either sex, and as long as movies like this keep getting made it’s going to be more difficult for the sexes to kind of get over those caveman perspectives.
I also agree men and women can be friends. They certainly should be able to. It’s not as though homosexuality isn’t becoming more and more widely acknowledged and there isn’t any reason people of the same sex preference can’t be friends with the same sex either. These generalizations are more powerful than the way I think most people actually feel.
I do agree that “My Best Friends Wedding” is a more realistic point of view than than Made Of Honor.
At the end of the day I think both men and women want to have it all and neither know what they want. 🙂
LikeLike
My Best Friend’s Wedding is a much better film than Made of Honor. For one, My Best Friend’s Wedding is clever and funny. Made of Honor is just dumbly cute in its own dim-wittedness. Not. Even. Comparable.
Men and women can be friends, they just don’t realize it sometimes. They only ask themselves that crucial question when they’re eying someone they’re interested in.
LikeLike
I prefer Made of Honor. Only because I prefer happy endings.
LikeLike
“He was a typical man who decided that he was in love with his best friend once she was happy with someone else.”
… I’m sad anyone feels this way about men, that this is the norm. I truly hope you are with someone who was an exception in your mind and are very happy! I lived in a homebuilt motorhome van out of college for just under 5 years after graduating, working in the fields as a geophysicist, shooting seismic surveys for oil exploration, in the cold winters and hot summers rough work but fun. Showering with a hanging bag most days. But I decided to live the “delayed gratification” life like my mom and dad did early in their marriage, saving working investing, and taking percentages of oil projects for most of my pay. Now almost 12 years later I have a really fun and somewhat easy life, but never know why a girl goes out with me, is it for me or the large passive income and ability to travel and do anything. I even try to hide it but come off looking a little fake when I do. I think they somehow know. I’m a hopeless romantic and just wish I could find someone who isn’t focused on wealth and an easy ride. I am patient but it is difficult. I’m not a bad looking fella either, even was asked to do modeling in college but felt that was a shallow waste of time compared to studying. And I don’t think girls are typically shallow and only think about money and being taken care of, but I haven’t met any who are very far from that. I enjoyed this movie and believe there is redemption even for a guy like Tom! Oh well sorry for the lonely guy rant !
LikeLike
also, the scene in MBFW, just as they passed under the bridge, missing an opportunity we all felt, reminded me of the scene when Tom gives her the line of what she should say, but they are interrupted by the charging entourage,,, she felt something at that point, something even she didn’t know she felt…, we could all see it in her expression.
LikeLike
Just watched these two films back-to-back and was really really hoping that Hannah would still choose Colin in the end, like the ending in MBFW. I hate how Tom was allowed to be a total slut and still got the girl in the end— who was completely too good for him, something that was never touched on. Colin was the better man x1000.
LikeLiked by 1 person
You’ve totally just taken me back to this post that I’d fotgotten all about!
Which is also really strange as I have only just started watching Grey’s Anatomy this year and now find it rather amusing that both McDreamy and Owen were in Made of Honor!
LikeLike